My sense of security in an intimate relationship is directly related to my confession of failures, sins, faults and inadequacies. By confessing them [to that person], I remove the anxiety provoked in me by the prospect of their discovery. Once this anxiety is removed, I am free to participate [fully] in the relationship without need to manipulate it. I no longer need to manipulate [people] for the purpose of preventing discovery of my faults. Thus I’m free to focus on the needs of the other person; free to engage my curiosity and join the other person where they are [as opposed to dragging them to where I am].
I am free to disagree without criticizing.
I am free to agree without co-opting.
I am free to postpone without fear of retribution.